Is It Normal for Me to Be Nervous Before Wedding?

This post is for those feeling a little nervous before the wedding. We will cover why you may be nervous and whether being nervous is a healthy emotion before your wedding.

The goal of Wedistry is to help reduce stress. We hope that by the time you finish reading this blog post, you will feel better about how you feel.

The challenge for any bride and groom is that wedding planning and getting married present a unique set of circumstances with unusual emotions. We rarely deal with these emotions at one time in our lives. Wedding planning is highly stressful on its own. When it’s our wedding that we’re planning and thinking about making a lifetime commitment to our spouse, we are handling multiple types of stress at one time.

What if you knew feeling nervous before your wedding was perfectly normal? What if you also knew that feeling nervous doesn’t mean you love your spouse any less than if you were not? And finally, what if you knew that being nervous before a wedding is a good, healthy sign that could mean you love your spouse?

Related Resource: 6 Best Wedding Anniversary Gift Ideas to Dazzle your Spouse

In short, being nervous before a wedding does NOT make you a bad person. You may be nervous for all the right reasons, like wanting your wedding to go well without interruption. You may be nervous before the wedding because you want your guests to enjoy themselves. You may be nervous before the wedding because you are thinking about the cost of your wedding. There may be several perfectly good reasons you feel the way you do.

Being nervous alone is not a cause for concern. It is a perfectly healthy human emotion that means you are invested in what is happening. It means that you are alive and your heart is involved in what is happening. There may be other reasons to be concerned; however, being nervous alone is not one of them.

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Reasons Why We Get Nervous Before Wedding

The Right Nervous

Remember that many events in our lives cause us to have good nerves. Remember your first time trying new food, riding a roller coaster, or asking someone to be your friend? Remember your first vacation, first date, or first time driving? At some point, we get used to getting nervous when we face new and exciting experiences, but when it comes time to be nervous before a wedding, we feel guilty about how we feel. We talk ourselves into believing that because we are nervous about embarking on the unknown, that means something about how we feel about the person. This is not true.

What to Watch

We can watch for things to be concerned about these feelings, such as not feeling prepared to marry the person or not feeling like we know the person intimately. These are reasons that our nervous feelings may be justified. Every couple should take the opportunity to prepare by attending pre-marital counseling to ensure they truly believe they are doing what is necessary to get ready to spend their life with this person.

The only real reason to be concerned is if you are unprepared to marry. But here’s the good news. You can set a plan for yourselves to ensure that the nervousness before the wedding is not as much about the unknown as it is that feeling of hopeful expectation.

Have a Little Help from a Friend

One of the best things you can do is literally to keep your emotions in front of you leading up to your wedding. This is not a time to retreat and not share your feelings. You should keep a healthy conversation with the pastor performing your pre-marital counseling with your spouse-to-be and a trusted friend who knows you well.

These conversations will keep you grounded and help you understand why you feel the way you do leading up to your wedding day. After all, you want to enjoy getting married. This is not just for your guests. This is one of the very few best days of your life.

A Plan for You

Your plan to handle your emotional outlook must be custom-tailored to you. How you express your feelings, the people you speak with, and your plan to destress will not look like the next person’s. Be creative and stay engaged with the preparation process, and you will be happy that you made a plan just for you.

Hopefully, by now, you know it’s okay to be nervous. But remember to keep talking about how you feel as often as you need to, especially with your future spouse, even on your wedding day.

The next step is to develop a plan to help you handle nervousness as your wedding day approaches.

Thank you for reading, and we genuinely hope that you are feeling better about your special day!

author avatar
Aaron Smith
Hi, my name is Aaron! I’m glad to be the founder of Wedistry, a collection of tools and tips to prepare couples for their wedding day. I am currently the manager of the Wedistry Blog and Wedistry for Wedding Parties on the App Store. Thanks for stopping by and I hope that you find this content helpful during your wedding planning process.

About Our Content Creators

Aaron is a wedding officiant with 12 years of experience. After being a guest in weddings and a member of wedding parties numerous times, he was inspired to create ways to better support couples through wedding planning tools.

Aaron is an ordained minister and holds an M. Div. from the University of Chicago.

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2 responses to “Is It Normal for Me to Be Nervous Before Wedding?”

  1. moretha Avatar

    Everyone, especially during this type of celebration, has a tendency to forget things. Nervousness and excitement coexisted. That is why having someone to rely on who can take care of the details while you enjoy the party is important. Everyone was blown away by how wonderfully the staff handled the big number of guests I invited on my wedding at Victory North Savannah (https://www.victorynorthsavannah.com/weddings).

    1. Aaron Smith Avatar

      That is so true. Thankfully, there are a few things that we can do to prepare for this special moment.

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